BY THEO KARANTSALIS
My first suicide attempt came at age 12, when I was a seventh grader at Will C. Wood Middle School in Alameda, Calif.
A regular day at school included switching the spark plug wires on teachers' cars or shooting fire extinguishers in the hall. The best day ever was when I shot a spit ball at Mrs. Cooper and she turned around and fired an eraser at the head of my friend Mike.
But the finer moments of youth were tempered by terrorizing visions, inter-dimensional energy fields and evil spirits. The idea of death for me was one of liberation as I felt detached from life.
A bottle of sleeping pills from the cupboard went missing one spring day in 1974 and ended up in my pocket and then in mouth. Wood school only had three floors but their was a staircase that led to the roof. As I laid down, the sound of kids playing outside waned.
It was soon time to go to heaven as a fluorescent green cave started its descent. When the death cave landed, it was time to get in.
By the grace of God, I did not enter the cave and instead hobbled home. Unlike my second suicide attempt in 1977, which required hospitalization, no one ever knew.
Suicide risk among those with bipolar disorder is one of the highest of all mental illnesses. The earlier it strikes, the higher the risk.
Photo: Theo Karantsalis at age 12, in 1974, shortly before attempting suicide for the first time.
Suggested reading: Suicidality in Pediatric Bipolar Disorder
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